Category: From AA Agnostica

By Richard Clark

Years ago, I realized addicts and people in twelve-step and recovery groups are often puzzled about dishonesty (I know I was about my own). Honesty and dishonesty are flip sides of the same thing and exist on a sliding scale. Honesty is arguably the most significant factor in active addiction, recovery, the steps, being recovered, Buddhism, and relationships. Even though frequently ignored, Bill Wilson advised us about the importance of rigorous honesty in How It Works (Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 58). However, honesty cannot be understood because people are generally confused between two opposing opinions. (a) From traditional religious AA, dishonesty is a character defect (the majority opinion). Or (b) dishonesty in addicts is a symptom of illness (the minority opinion).

1^st Side Note: A person feels ill. Their symptoms are coughing with phlegm, shortness of breath, increasing chest pain, fever, nausea and occasional vomiting. Their doctor diagnoses pneumonia and recommends antibiotics, tea, bed rest, chicken soup (whatever). The person recovers. Here’s the point: At no time did the doctor tell them to stop with the fever. No one demanded they quit with the night sweats and fever. We all agree fever is accepted as an unavoidable symptom—fever and pneumonia are a ‘package deal.’

2^nd Side Note: Addiction exists separate from all other counselling endeavours. In relation to addiction there are five visible social symptoms that professionals rely on to evaluate the illness.

1. Self-harm and harm to others; being deliberately negligent.
2. Dishonest and evasive; manipulating/withholding.
3. Being arrogant that conceals insecurity.
4. Being callous and insensitive.
5. Appearing belligerent and defiant.

All addicts, regardless of the addiction, have these five symptom constellations; they are not different categories of bad character. To affect stable recovery, it is essential to shift perceptions from ‘bad character’ to illness. This means that dishonesty, along with the other four symptoms, are not ‘defects.’

3^rd Side Note: I have been asked why I frequently refer to Buddhism when discussing addiction. What I have believed (for forty years) is Siddhartha’s psychology of emotional transformation going from dukkha to nirvana (not the religious views that became popular after his death) is very similar to the journey from active addiction to compassionate recovery (atheist/agnostic recovery, not the religious views). In Siddhartha Gautama’s teaching, c. 500 BCE, honesty wasn’t a declared part of his four truths. It was a naturally understood requirement: when achieving nirvana honesty (and responsibility) are axiomatic necessities, so essential and obvious they didn’t warrant mention. [In another writing I explain that experiencing nirvana is a matter of psychology. Religious interference in Buddhist discipline is what causes this chaos.]

 

Consider that “There are few things about which people are less honest than their attitude toward honesty. Everybody claims to favor it and to consider it important, and an open accusation of dishonesty is a heinous, actionable insult. Yet our public life is permeated by a staggering tolerance for quite deliberate dishonesty. …At most, sophisticated people joke about [dishonesty].” Walter Kaufmann, from The Faith of a Heretic, 1961.

In our era, no one entering a therapeutic relationship needs to be told that they should be honest—it’s an expected requirement. It would be rather insulting to admonish a person to be honest in counselling or at meetings, and yet people are dishonest but know not why.

In 1939, personal therapy and Buddhism didn’t exist in social consciousness. And Bill Wilson’s passion on behalf of alcoholics was limited by his self-deprecating religious views of character and alcohol consumption. Yet he knew being honest was one crucial issue necessary to facilitate recovery. In Alcoholics Anonymous, he suggested that dishonesty (symptom #2) was an unavoidable trait of the alcoholic. He shoved ‘dishonesty’ into the general category of character defects, but dishonesty is not a defect for addicts. It’s a required symptom of the illness. Pneumonia requires fever (it’s a symptom) and getting rid of the fever doesn’t get rid of pneumonia. Addiction requires dishonesty, it’s a symptom not a defect, and demanding that an addict stop lying ‘right now’ is the same as ordering someone with pneumonia to stop having a fever.

In the first few paragraphs of ‘How It Works’ Mr. Wilson speaks directly to thoroughly following the path, willing commitment, being fearless and thorough, and insisting on rigorous honesty. He wrongly classified dishonesty as a character defect but realized, without knowing why, alcoholics have no choice in the matter of dishonesty while in addiction. They are inveterate liars and being deceitful is not optional; hence the conclusion that honesty is never accidental, it’s a necessary mental symptom.

What may be more important is his sequence of presentation: first he suggests that steadfast commitment to rigorous honesty is crucial, and then Mr. Wilson presents his view of God and the steps. Rigorous honesty first (of overriding importance) and then next came second God and the Steps.

 

Addicts lie in their thoughts, in their words, often lie when making commitments, lie to themselves, and conceal and deceive; they cannot do otherwise. ‘Yes, it was all my fault,’ (but silently thinking only 97%). Being 97% honest is lying. Like pneumonia and fever, being dishonest is in the fabric of the illness. To improve recovery, to achieve the promises, to stay far away from relapse requires rigorous honesty in both fact and in detail.

Many people in the recovery/treatment community oftentimes assume honesty will just magically happen. They’ve been abstinent and sober, so honesty just happens like magnetism: being sober attracts honesty. Or they are honest because they hang around with other people who claim they are honest. Honesty rubs off on you, doesn’t it? Or, honesty is like getting old, it just happens. These are all evasions of responsibility. People have been clean and sober for so long that others just assume they are honest.

Addicts will drink eight bottles of beer and tell you they drank ten. They will be dishonest about what they had for breakfast. Their spouse wasn’t unpleasant they were notoriously nasty. Forty-four years of attending meetings and 40 years as a therapist leaves me with no doubt that, while believing they are not deliberately lying, addicts rationalize, minimize, and exaggerate, sliding around rigorous honesty. This is a set up for tenuous recovery and relapse. Why?

It is common knowledge that addicts are overburdened with shame and guilt. Much of that is imposed upon them by an unforgiving society that has miniscule compassion for addicts. And the above quote from Mr. Kaufmann shows that society avoids truth-telling and makes light of dishonesty.

Addicts live with unresolved shame and guilt and being sober (even for a long time) does not automatically dissolve shame and guilt; for most people it hides it. The psychology of addiction requires addicts hide and deceive; their guilt and shame are emotional realities that demand concealment and dishonesty. An unsympathetic society does not make truth-telling easy for addicts who lie as a symptom of their illness. That’s the psychological double-whammy: Society insists we be honest, but tolerates dishonesty on the grand scale, and with their prejudice against addicts (especially drug addicts) when we are honest, oftentimes we’re not believed, or they think we are manipulating. This hopeless cycle leads to relapse.

Set Up One: my drinking/acting out/porn/drug addiction was very shameful—>I must conceal most of it—>I tell lies—>now I conceal the shame of my addiction and also have to conceal the shame that I am lying—>No one can find out I am lying and concealing so I withdraw from support—>I relapse.

Set up Two: my addiction was very ordinary and uneventful compared to those really bad war stories I hear—>I don’t feel entitled to be here—maybe I am not an addict—>I can’t admit I’m ordinary so maybe I’ll exaggerate a little and brag to get some attention—>(or) I’ll hide my ordinary story and pretend I’m not hiding—>I am lying—>No one can find out I am lying and concealing so I withdraw from support—>I relapse.

 

Honesty is never accidental, and addicts can’t ‘just quit’ lying because someone tells them to. Being honest must become a conscious, determined, self-directed, and specific mental exercise. Rigorous honesty cannot be haphazard, it’s a conscious and deliberately self-imposed discipline. It is of great merit that Mr. Wilson identified honesty as the initial, primary requirement of recovery—it’s first, ahead of God and the steps. It’s priority status and importance are commonly ignored, especially by religious pundits.

What’s the consequence of not believing this? In my first dozen years of working with others, I was always curious about relapse; the why’s and wherefores; the set ups. Being a therapist and talking about addiction many hours each week, I always believed that relapse was never spontaneous or sudden, it was a planned event. In the late 1990s I was offering a series of seminars to a group of counsellors. They led me to the understanding that what was common to all relapse is the presence of dishonesty before the event.

Anyone who relapses, especially after a few months or years of sobriety, has been dishonest. This includes counsellors who may be ‘dishonest’ in the manner of their work. People rationalize why they have been dishonest but are blind to dishonesty prior to all relapses. However, to an addict (and for some professionals) rigorous honesty is often dangerous. There may be legal, relationship, or employment repercussions, lost jobs, damaged friendships, divorces, or the creation of enemies. Not everyone admires a rigorously honest person. What keeps some people lying is their belief they cannot survive the consequences of honesty.

This creates a life-or-death conundrum in recovery: If an addict is rigorously honest, they might grievously damage their life circumstances, but if they are not rigorously honest, they will relapse. Even when an addict or counsellor is made aware of these opposing possibilities (which are very real and not to be trivialized) they will often only minimize or mitigate their lying to a ‘tolerable’ level. This foments disaster. Being honest is an exhausting exercise of continuing improvement. It is the never-ending development of moral courage.

Next week I will outline my experience of the changing demands of rigorous honesty during step work. That is why there is such an overwhelming amount of 1-2-3-4-5 sharing and so little insightful discussion of Steps 6 to 12.

Thank you for taking the time to read this,
Richard Clark

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Richard Clark has been clean and sober since September 1980 and has always been open about his atheism. He became involved in AA because of the compassion of an old-timer who was a devout Christian. Richard is now sober 44 years with no relapses, active in his weekly agnostic meeting, and never concealed his atheism. Professionally, Richard has been a therapist in addictions work since 1985. For several decades he’s been committed to the ancient Buddhist stream of Arhat consciousness and been recognized as a Pratyeka-buddha, pre-Theravada practise (and still working at it). He offers private counselling sessions with clients from across Canada. He has written three books and is presently writing a fourth book for addiction counsellors… and plans a fifth book on the psychology of recovery in Buddhism (atheist version). There is more information about him at Green Room Lectures.

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For a PDF of this article, click here: Rigorous Honesty and Addiction Recovery (Part One).

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The post Rigorous Honesty and Addiction Recovery (Part One – Dishonesty and Addiction) first appeared on AA Agnostica.

by bob k.

January 11 The spirituality of imperfection begins with the recognition that trying to be perfect is the most tragic human mistake.
The Spirituality of Imperfection, Kurtz & Ketcham, p. 5

The authors elaborate on this idea and, in doing so, get to the core of Alcoholics Anonymous. “In direct contradiction of the serpent’s promise in Eden’s Garden, the book Alcoholics Anonymous suggests, ‘First of all, we had to quit playing God.’ According to the way of life that flows from this insight, it is only by ceasing to play God, by coming to terms with errors and shortcomings, and by accepting the inability to control every aspect of their lives that alcoholics (or any human beings) can find the peace and serenity that alcohol (or other drugs, or sex, money, material possessions, power, or privilege) promise but never deliver.” (Kurtz & Ketcham, p. 5)

The American Dream offers false promises. Bill Wilson developed low self-esteem as the result of a trying childhood. He thought that money, material possessions, power and privilege would bring the admiration of his fellows, prestige, and an elevated sense of self-worth. Years earlier, some such feelings had come when his kindly maternal grandfather had made a huge fuss about his successful construction of a boomerang. “You’re a Number One man!”

Here was the key—accomplishment.

Determination and persistence would bring achievement and happiness would follow. In the adult world, that didn’t prove to be true and Wilson numbed himself with increasing quantities of alcohol, even during his period of material success. His “life formula” was flawed. He sought admiration but instead was seen as a drunken, loutish braggart.

When you had success, was it disappointing? Is 12-step spirituality more appealing than religion? Is it a fruitless mission to seek to control things falling outside of a very small range? Were you attracted to the openness of your peers in recovery regarding their imperfection?

January 12 Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle. Some things are within your control. And some things are not.
Epictetus, d. 145 A.D.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.

If only it were that easy—trillions of life mistakes would be poofed away!

At least the prayer is calling attention to something a tremendous number of people seem unconscious of as they go about their daily business of telling others how to fix their daily business. The wisdom of 19 centuries ago applies to-day. Each individual has a very limited locus of control. Very limited. The genius of my insights aside, people are little interested in my plans for their lives. They fail to comply and I am hurt.

What is wrong with these people?

We can become so busy with our plans for others—spouses, children, bosses, coworkers, neighbors, in-laws and legislators—that we neglect to change the things we can. Epictetus also mentions freedom. We can become chained to our machinations for improving the lives of other people. Our motives are so pure that it is difficult to recognize that we have embarked on an ill-fated venture.

Let’s move forward with more attention paid to the wisdom of Epictetus and Reverend Niebuhr.

Am I something of a control freak? Do I have great ideas for what other folks should be doing? Am I disappointed when my loving direction is ignored? How important is it that someone might load the dishwasher imperfectly?

January 13 EVERYDAY HABITS THAT DRAIN OUR ENERGY

1. Taking things too personally
2. Taking things too personally
3. Taking things too personally
4. Over-stressing
5. Sleeping in late
6. Fueling drama
7. Having a poor diet
8. Complaining all the time
9. Overthinking
10. Gossiping
11. Not living in the moment
12. Trying to please others

This is a list of classic mistakes. If one examines 5,000 inspirational quotes, there aren’t 5,000 different pieces of advice. A relatively small number of kernels of wisdom appear again and again. Following the triple warning against taking things too personally, the list moves to a huge one for the excessively anxious! Sleeping late can be an effort to hide from the world. Over-stressing, fuelling drama and constantly complaining aren’t big issues for me. We’re all a bit different. Overthinking, not living in the moment and trying to please others are failings for me. I’m not big on gossiping, but I can fall into it.

There are some physical elements on the list. In modern recovery, there’s a lot of talk about caring for the body. I could be better regarding diet and exercise and I like sleeping in. In my experience, when I want to make some positive changes, I do best focusing on one, two, or three zones of improvement and monitoring myself for progress in these areas. Perhaps I can try to get a friend to join in the challenge. That raises the level of commitment and the accountability from checking in regularly is beneficial.

What energy drainers jump out at you? Are you currently working on changing any? Can you add to the list?

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The featured image at the top of this page can be found on this very new website, created by bob’s niece, Cynthia: https://bobk.ca/.

And this is the biography she included:

Bob k has been a sober and active member of Alcoholics Anonymous since October 28, 1991. He is the son of an alcoholic who was the son of an alcoholic. Bob qualifies for Al Alon and Adult Children of Alcoholics and has been to meetings of those two societies. He has also visited Narcotics Anonymous, Cocaine Anonymous, and Food Addicts in Recovery.

From 2004-2006, Bob supplied articles on AA’s “Big Book” to Toronto Intergroup’s newsletter, Better Times.

He has been a regular contributor to the websites AAAgnostic.org and AA Beyond Belief. Many of those essays were on the subject of AA history. In 2015, Bob published Key Players in AA History.

A second, expanded edition of that volume was released in 2023 as was The Secret Diaries of Bill W., a fictional look at AA’s founder. Bob has made presentations at AA history meetings and at conferences.

Coming soon is Almost Hopeless : Pre-AA Efforts to Reform America’s Alcoholics.

Bob worked in sales for many years before a dramatic career change in 1990 to teaching golf. He was a respected member of the PGA of Canada for many years and had some successes, provincially and nationally, as a player. Whitby, just east of Toronto, is home.

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For a PDF of this article, click here: Daily Reflections.

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The post Daily Reflections first appeared on AA Agnostica.

By bob k.

In school, I did well on writing assignments and exams that were of an essay-format. Later, I did some fantasizing about becoming a writer. In those long-gone days, every few weeks, Johnny Carson would bring on an author for the last 7 minutes of his late night talk show. In my area, that would take place close to one am and in my intoxicated state, I’d imagine exchanging witty banter with Johnny. That did not lead to anything getting written. In many areas, I’ve been more of a dreamer than a doer.

Twenty years ago, my friend Agnostic Gord became the editor of the Toronto Intergroup newsletter. I penned some columns and enjoyed the entire process. For a person prone to low self-esteem, it was gratifying to see my work in print under the byline “Sunglasses Bob K.” In retrospect, it was surely a far bigger deal to me than to anyone else.

In 2011, I wrote a screed opposing the use of “The Lord’s Prayer” in AA meetings and submitted it to The Grapevine. The letter of rejection was lovely. I imagined the GSO folks tossing my labor into the wastebasket while assuring me that my essay would be kept “on file.” That event occurred right around the time that Toronto Intergroup had booted out two groups that described themselves as “agnostic.” That event led to the creation of the AAAgnostica.org website.

I thought: “These heathens will love my Lord’s Prayer rant” and I posted it as a comment on one of the Agnostica articles. I have to say that, over the years, there have been a few people who regularly wrote 2,000 word comments on 1,500 word Agnostica essays. That’s pretty dumb—when someone ELSE does it. I became a frequent contributor to the website and my submissions on AA’s origins led to the publication of Key Players in AA History in 2015.

Many people who’ve written nothing previously sit down to write a book. That’s really hard to do, I expect. I found myself having written half of a book, almost by accident, as I rattled off 2,000 word essays.

My second book, The Secret Diaries of Bill W., is biographical (or historical) fiction. Once more, I was taking the easier route as my story of AA’s founder followed a timeline of real events. I created dialogue and some inner thoughts of Bill’s but I had an existing framework upon which to hang my imaginings of what might have happened. Fiction writers, so they tell us, often draw on real-life experiences and then jazz them up a bit. Possibly more than a bit.

My latest effort Daily Reflections for Modern Twelve Step Recovery came to Amazon on January 1st—only a few short days ago.

In essence, this also is a book of essays. There was no single target of writing a 370 page volume—rather several (366) smaller projects of 350-400 words each. As was the case with Key Players, research played as great a role as writing. The internet has thousands of inspirational quotes. Find one you like, contribute some analysis, and there’s a page. Rinse and repeat. Other reflections are based on quotations from my many books on AA. I have most of the history books and almost all of the recent efforts that secularize the 12-step process.

In December of 2023, I had spotted a Facebook comment asking if there were other secular reflections books like Joe C.’s  marvellous Beyond Belief: Agnostic Musings for 12 Step Life (2013) I thought: “That would be an interesting project” and got underway last January. By the end of March a first draft was 90% complete. At times, my rate of production was furious. I follow the general philosophy of: “Get it on paper and schmooze it later.” I was reporting nightly for a while to my good friend Charles. Some days, I cranked out 7, 8, or 9 reflections—2 to 3 thousand words per day. Accountability is helpful. Reporting to my friend kept the hectic pace going and staved off a possible burnout.

To be clear, someone with full-time employment, a real job so-to-speak, or kids, could not match that pace. Life gets in the way. My seasonal business made my spring and summer dedication to finishing the book somewhat erratic.

The tedious part of the undertaking is the seemingly endless proofreading and editing that follows. I even enjoy that aspect of the process, except on the days that I don’t.

Daily Reflections for Modern Twelve Step Recovery

Let’s allow the book to explain itself a bit.

We have this from the back cover: Modern 12 Step recovery, and spirituality in general, is vastly different from what was encountered at the time AA was emerging from its evangelical Christian roots. Members in the current era often do not believe in God or are agnostic. Spirituality comes in shapes and sizes unimaginable in the America of the 1930s. You’ll find the reflections in this book to be psychological rather than religious.

Next we have the Amazon blurb reads as follows: The thinly veiled Christianity of Richmond Walker’s “24 Hours In A Day” book was more palatable in 1955 and 1965 than it is in 2025. Many people in 12-Step recovery groups are ready for a different sort of daily reader – one stressing the psychological rather than the magical. “Daily Reflections for Modern 12-Step Recovery” draws from diverse sources. We travel back many centuries to glean wisdom from Daoists, Buddhists, Stoics, and Greek philosophers. From the very recent era of self-publishing, you’ll find excerpts from books that tailor 12-Step recovery to specific demographics – women, secularists, non-egomaniacs and others. In between the ancient insights and the new, we find wise words from philosophers, presidents, activists, inventors, sports icons and entertainers. We look at the science of addiction and provide some snippets of recovey history. This volume is not your father’s Oldsmobile. It’s a modern and practical guide to having a better life in recovery and definitely is secularist-friendly.

I particularly liked that my daily reader addresses core issues. In doing that, it is newcomer-friendly. Here are a few of the Quotes of the Day in that vein.

January 2  The victim is caught in an increasingly vicious circle. Drunkenness, acute nervous hangover, remorse, feelings of inferiority; then drunkenness again. A sanitarium may temporarily check the outward expression of this state of mind, but the inner urge continues to exist. – The Common Sense of Drinking, Richard Peabody 1892-1936   p. 7

January 29  Moderation!! A drink of liquor is to my appetite what a red-hot coal of fire is to a keg of dry powder. You can as easily shoot a ball from a cannon’s mouth moderately, or fire off a magazine slowly, as I can drink liquor moderately. When I take one drink, if it is but a taste, I must have more, if I knew hell would burst out of the earth and engulf me the next instant. I am either perfectly sober, with no smell of liquor about me, or I am very drunk. – Fifteen Years in Hell (1885), Luther Benson 1844-1898, p. 85

February 15  Proposition: “You like having resentments.” Why? Because they serve a purpose. What does a resentment do for you? – Glenn Rader, author of Modern 12 Step Recovery

July 17  The “need for others” is the most famous facet of Alcoholics Anonymous. Those outside of AA often regard it condescendingly, interpreting it away as “the substitution of a social dependence for a drug dependence” (Stanton Peale); or as “accepting the emotional immaturity of alcoholics and supplying a crutch for it.” (Francis Chambers) – Shame & Guilt, Ernest Kurtz, p. 34

December 27  You don’t get over an addiction by stopping using. You recover by creating a new life where it is easier to not use. If you don’t create a new life, then all the factors that brought you to your addiction will catch up with you again. – Anonymous

We have multiple reminders to be more kind, more grateful, more positive, and more appreciative. I love William Butler Yeats’ wise words: “The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” More than once we are urged to let go of things like perfectionism, bitterness, and our efforts to control other people. These are fine ideas that we are prone to forget. A daily reader supplies us with gentle admonitions to take the action that will lead to greater peace of mind. Having one that’s God-free is certain to appeal to the readers of this website.

To return briefly to the subject of writing, here’s a thought: “If you want to be a writer, you need to start writing.” That’s much akin to the AA oldtimer axiom that if you want to stop drinking, you’ve got to stop drinking. It’s remarkable how difficult that can be. Here’s a psychiatrist and addiction specialist on that subject:

January 3  Addiction is a terrifying breakdown of reason. People struggling with addiction say they want to stop, but, even with the obliterated nasal passages, scarred livers, overdoses, court cases, lost jobs, and lost families, they are confused, incredulous, and, above all, afraid. They are afraid because they cannot seem to change despite the fact that they so often watch themselves, clear-eyed, do the things they don’t want to do. – The Urge, Carl Erik Fisher, pp. 4-5

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AAAgnostica.org has now published three bob k books. “Key Players in AA History,” now in an expanded Second Edition, continues to sell well (for a special-interest volume). “Secret Diaries” has been less successful but was a fun and challenging creative project. The new book “Daily Reflections for Modern Twelve Step Life” is available on Amazon. The price has been discounted for the month of January.

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For a PDF of today’s article, click here: Daily Reflections and the Writing Process.

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The post Daily Reflections and the Writing Process first appeared on AA Agnostica.

By Bobby Beach

In case you are unfamiliar with the acronym, PLBB stands for Plain Language Big Book. The General Service Conference (GSC) approved the publication of a supplemental version of the book Alcoholics Anonymous specifically aimed at the many Americans with limited reading skills. The book was made available for sale November 1. By all accounts, sales are brisk.

The simplified text has been written at a 5th Grade reading level. This volume does not replace the Bigga Booka. An unaltered Fifth Edition of the divinely-inspired original is expected next year (possibly 2026) and will carry us well past AA’s 100th anniversary with no significant change to the 1939 text.

If the idea of a simplified book seems to you to be an excellent way to improve AA’s outreach to the underprivileged populations that also experience higher rates of addiction and incarceration, I agree. The inmate who attends the AA meeting brought by volunteers into the institution will soon be able to be given a (soft cover) book that they will have a chance of reading and understanding. They will be able to explore what AA has to offer and perhaps garner some self-esteem by working their way through a book on their own. Words like “vicissitudes”’ and “fallacious” have been replaced by simpler terms with the same meaning.

Is the New Book Needed?

A bit of Googling shows that the American Psychological Association reports that 21% of adults in the United States read below a 5th-grade level and 19% of high school graduates struggle with reading. The U.S. Department of Education found that only 54% of adults read at a proficient level. There is certainly a large population who stands to benefit from having a simpler Bigga Booka to read. Even apart from generational differences in idiom, the 1939 volume is written above the comprehension level of millions of potential readers. Dr. Bob Smith remarked in the 1940s that he thought the original text was “over the head” of the average factory worker.

A 2021 General Service Conference resolution says as follows: “A study was done in the U.S. to find out the literacy level of people. Literacy means the ability to identify or evaluate one or more pieces of information, which requires different levels of interpretation of a text. Experts have assessed the level required to read and understand the text of the Big Book. They have determined that it corresponds to level 3 on a scale of 5. According to studies conducted in the U.S., 48% of the population was at a level 3 or higher. That means that 52% of the population would not have been able to sufficiently understand what is written in the Big Book.”

The second PLBB mission is to make the book more relatable to 21st Century readers. That has sparked a great many rumors.

Secularization

Prior to the book’s release, many of those in the anti-PLBB camp were warning about the pending secularization of the Bigga Booka. God was going to be removed!! There has been a lot of Facebook chatter about “hidden agendas.” The woke, leftist, liberal progressives were pushing their woke ideas! (Is the opposite of “woke” “asleep”? Asking for a friend.)

The removal of God simply didn’t happen.

In the dreaded “WE AGNOSTICS” chapter of the Plain Language Bigga Booka, the word “God” appears 54 times! Check out the “secular” slant of the rewrite.

“… ’the God stuff’… was the only way to begin recovering…” (p. 54)

“… spirituality is the only way to deal with alcoholism…” (p. 54)

“We just needed to decide what God meant to us… Accepting the idea that God may exist is all you need to start building a spiritual practice for yourself.” (p. 57)

“We saw that we might be destroyed by our alcoholism if we didn’t create a relationship with God. We decided that changing our thinking about spirituality was better than the alternative.” (pp. 57-58)

“Many of us stubbornly cling to the idea that our universe needs no God to explain its mysteries… Doesn’t that sound a little arrogant?” (p. 58)

“God’s existence was as clear and true as our own existence. We connected with God deep inside of ourselves.” (p, 62)

“God has come to all who have honestly sought a connection with a Power greater than themselves. When we allowed ourselves to become closer to God, we found God.” (p. 63)

Holy mislabeling, Bobby Beach!! The freaken Pope is more secular than that chit!!! Are the folks who predicted secularization lining up to apologize?

The human animal hates being wrong, Grasshopper. They keep grasping at straws. The removal of a few “Him’s” remains sacrilegious in the “We shoulda stayed in the Oxford Group” camp. Although AA offers some latitude in choosing one’s own conception of God, the Christers are hopeful that you’ll come around to theirs.

“Higher Power” is a Bigga Booka term and in the PLBB, it is used to replace some of the “Him” references.

“Higher Power” (with capital letters) is explicitly equated with God – there’s no secularization – but the God of the PLBB is a good deal more compatible with the diverse spirituality of twenty-first century believers. Christian AA fundamentalists are on the warpath about these subtle modifications. Their full right to practice the faith of their choice is entirely undisturbed but their right to impose that creed on everyone else in AA has taken a hit. Think about that during the Lord’s Freaken Prayer!!

If It Ain’t Broke, Don’t Fix It

The Plaina Language Bigga Booka has been slightly de-Christianized. It seems to have been forgotten that the first de-Christing of the text came at the hands of Billa Wilsona! (Sorry, I got carried away) The name “Jesus” does not appear in the vaunted “First 164.”

The “We don’t want to change anything” folks are freaking out! They are opposed by the “We need to adapt to survive” people. The first group loves the phrase If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. They assume the ain’t broke part is true but it ain’t… er…. I mean isn’t. Based on AA’s own figures, membership peaked in 1992. That’s quite a long time ago. The drop in numbers of over 500,000 (20%) has even more impact when we factor in an increase in population of about 30%. Outside of the United States, AA is having even greater difficulty clinging to its market share.

In the simpest way of looking at these issues, those acknowledging that AA has problems fall into two distinct camps regarding causality:

1. AA is too much like it was 1939;
2. AA is not enough like it was in 1939.

The second group opposes all change of any kind. These are the folks who detest Living Sober and even the The Twelve and Twelve. They hate the introduction “Hi, I’m Chris. I’m an alcoholic and an addict.” They have a distaste for discussion meetings. They want the damned atheists and the damned agnostics to get the hell out and take the freaken druggies with them. Form your own God-hating organization and leave us alone!!!

They are outraged by Bill W.’s liberal statements about inclusivity but trot out some 1959 letter in which he defends AA’s use of the Lord’s Prayer like it was chiselled onto stone tablets. These folks are outraged that changes are being made to the divinely freaken inspired Bigga Booka, albeit that isn’t what’s happening. The PLBB is a supplemental text not a replacement.

To Partners

When the Bigga Booka rolled off the presses on April 10, 1939, Florence R. was the only sober woman. Her First Edition story, “A Feminine Victory,” was the one and only account of a female alcoholic. A strong case can easily be made that AA’s principal text was written by men for men. Here’s the strong case: Because it was! We have Dr. Bob’s famous remarks from the summer of 1939: “We have never had a woman. We will not work on a woman.”

A chapter in the 1939 book is addressed to the spouses of alcoholics and it was called “TO WIVES.” Since then, well over a million women alcoholics have gotten sober in AA. Eighty-five years past the publication of the original text, we have a chapter addressed to spouses and it’s called “TO WIVES.” Here you go, Joe! Read this and you’ll know how to support Mary in her sobriety.

Over the years, various authors have suggested that the steps can be beneficial for women by employing a certain amount of tweaking. (“Tweaking” is what woke people do when they want to feel special, apparently) Thus we’ve seen publications such as The Little Red Book for Women and A Woman’s Guide to the Twelve Steps. We’re Not All Egomaniacs offers its modifications based on personality type.

Is Beth H. daring to say that we alcoholics ain’t all exactly the same, Bobby?

It be so, my shame-based friend.

In the PLBB, AA’s 12-step process has not been altered but the text employs more she/her pronouns thus reflecting a female component that has risen beyond a third of the total AA membership. The jaywalker character is a female in the PLBB, as is the employer in the Step Four chart. These are small “steps” – inadequate ones from the perspective of many – but better than nothing. The idiom of nine decades ago has been replaced in a number of instances. “Boiled as an owl” finds a more modern expression as does “the grouch and the brainstorm” and other phrases likely to be unfamiliar in 2024. More relatable terms take their place.

If you are still not seeing cause for objection, neither am I.

And yet, there is a panic among those opposing the new book that the liberal GSO (General Service Office) staff has brought its leftist agenda to Alcoholics Anonymous. The Make AA Great Again crowd has a huge problem with the term “partners.” LGBTQ+ people use that term and why the Hell are we giving them special treatment???!!! It’s no great surprise that those objecting to “partners” also vociferously oppose the Preamble change of “men and women” to “people.”

The Sky is Falling

The Fifth Edition is coming and will maintain its devotion to the words published in 1939. If that volume comes out in 2026, 25 years after the Fourth Edition which came out 25 years after the Third Edition, the opposers of change should be pretty safe until the Sixth Edition circa 2050. The dreaded slippery slope we’re warned of is far from precipitous. Nevertheless, the fear-mongering and future-tripping proceed at a furious pace. The good news is that this most vocal minority is indeed a minority.

So why are the fundies so panicked, Bobby Beach?

Well, Grasshopper, it’s freaken fun screeching “The sky is falling!! The sky is falling!!” and it’s ego-gratifying being a defender of the faith. The sky probably is falling, My Coca Cola-drinking Friend, but for different reasons.

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Bobby Beach has contributed a variety of articles to AA Agnostica. For a plain language edition of today’s essay send $49.95 to Bobby Beach Enterprises, Box 2050, New York, New York.

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For a PDF of today’s article, click here: The Plaina Language Bigga Booka.

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The post The Plaina Language Bigga Booka first appeared on AA Agnostica.

By Richard W. Clark

There are tens-of-thousands of inspirational quotes to be found on-line and in books innumerable and these have certainly been one of the shallow fascinations of people searching for an easier, softer way. Some people memorize pithy Big Book sentences, then announce them sincerely at AA clan gatherings, and ignore them at the first non-scrutinized opportunity. It is evident that some people cover the walls of their mind with these questionable inspirations and remain mediocre.

After being sincerely involved in studying religions for several decades, having lived in both Christian and Buddhist monasteries, and reading serious literature (both fiction and non-fiction) for over sixty years, what seems to be consistent is that ‘inspirational quotes’ can be impressive approaches to accomplishing nothing. It’s too easily assumed that a quoter of these quotes is a deep thinker rather than a good memorizer.

Pithy rejoinders are not evidence of integrity. This is often evident in listening to people talk about letting go of resentments which is reported to be one goal of stable recovery. Letting go of resentments is something to be achieved — and for a few people letting them go is a notable achievement. However, to create an awareness of a deeper responsibility here, I’ll begin with the basics, and yes, this is over-simplified.

For people who attend meetings, there are only two and a half ways of approaching recovery. The first is the Bill Wilson, God-prayer-forgiveness model initiated in 1939. A person may not necessarily become recovered but certainly being sober and belonging to the crowd of good Christians is considered a major improvement over being drunk, and it is a remarkable improvement. The second way is completely psychological, or maybe better said, being the atheist-agnostic version of recovery — the psychological approach. The third half-way choice is to try and straddle the line doing both religion and psychology and deciding to be undecided. We know from another pithy observation: half measures availed us nothing. This last way often leads to subtle insecurity and emotional chaos. My experience of these three alternatives is with wise council, the atheist-agnostic approach is by far the better choice. (I will explain clearly why this is true in a future submission.)

Prior to 1990 there were two categories of steps. Discussions were of the transformational steps (the first nine) or the maintenance steps (the last three). The last three were approached quite differently from the first nine. What’s more, Bill Wilson promised that near the end of Step Nine certain promises would appear in the lives of sober alcoholics that were the specific reward of Step 9. However, as regards his promises, there are two preconditions: painstaking and thorough.

The promises begin at p. 81 of Alcoholics Anonymous, ‘…know a new freedom and a new happiness’ through to the last one, ‘…we will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.’ These promises are psychological. The last line of that paragraph ‘…realize that God is doing for us…’ is a realization for believers not a promise. Promises and realizations are different. Addicts who choose agnostic-atheist recovery should understand that the promises, which are not dependant on God, indicate the addict has achieved a certain psychological stability that appears as the result of hard work. It is rarely observed that the promises are immediately followed by the maintenance steps. [Spiritual Transformation, by Richard W. Clark, has an in-depth description of the psychology of the promises.]

Maintenance, as with any complicated mechanical thing like sewing machines or cars, is to keep things running smoothly. The design of the maintenance steps is to advance or deepen a newfound level of honesty or compassion and kindness. Maintenance has fallen to disfavor in recent years because of the now-present assumption that everyone will relapse. Starting over, ad-nauseum, is the order of the day. One does not need maintenance if one is either forever in recovery (there’s nothing to maintain) or forever relapsing into unsavory defective behaviour (forever starting over). It is impossible to overstate the importance of ‘mental maintenance’ regarding the five spiritual principles. When finished with the first nine steps, living sincerely in maintenance is what being recovered means. ‘Being recovered’ doesn’t indicate perfection of character, it means being successful in the hour-by-hour or day-by-day routine of personality maintenance offered in Steps 10, 11, and 12.

As much as the significant majority of Bill Wilson’s writing is religious proselytizing and should be ignored as regards mental health, he did provide an accidental glimmer of wisdom regarding resentments. From Step Four and other sundry inferences, resentments are emotionally dangerous to a recovering addict. Fair enough and quite true. It would seem then, that resentments should be avoided… but the common presentation is letting them go, as they crop up let them go, get a resentment then let it go. What is missed in this repetitive inadequacy is the overwhelming presence of second-best recovery where one ignores the neatly hidden guide to avoiding resentments from appearing… but so few of us read with contemplation.

When the maintenance steps are clearly understood and applied without religious speculation, which is hard enough for most of us, even committed atheists, Step 10 is quite unique in the annals of self-help. Step 10 is quite clear that it is ‘continuous.’ We breathe and our hearts beat continuously. Continued to take personal inventory is clearly not two or three times a day or late in the evening. Why continuous? Because within Step 10, wrongs are to be promptly admitted. An inventory being continuous is what allows for promptly addressing any wrong. The spiritual goal here is to be prompt in making amends so the reflection on possible wrongs must be frequent. A continuous inventory may be one of the four or five most continuously ignored instructions from Mr. Wilson. Spiritual irresponsibility is continuously avoiding continued.

Assuming self-reflection is continuous and prompt, only then does Step Eleven meditation on the wisdom of others in relation to ‘wrong’ become of benefit. Regular meditation, based on the wisdom of others, should lead to an understanding of why we were so resentful or annoyed and rude in the first place. Being harshly judgemental or having an unexamined sense of entitlement, or not being compassionate; being an angry victim and blaming others, often motivate rudeness or callousness that warrants an amend being required. Step Eleven meditation is not to invoke God’s forgiveness when one is callous. The continuous self-examinations at Step 10 and subsequent meditations are to develop self-discipline and forestall callous rudeness or aggression. This, over the long term, eliminates resentments from arising and then three things become evident: one is a confidence in being able to calmly manage emotional situations, another is the realization that wrongs and amends become rare necessities, and kindness or compassion towards others become a graceful part of our character.

A similar observation is made about Buddhism — the assumption that Buddhist doctrine is to let resentments go. This is a second-best misapplication of what Siddhartha Gautama intended. The unspecified benefit of psychological recovery, of not becoming resentful rather than constantly having to let it go, is one of the dynamics of original Buddhist discipline before it became contaminated by religion.

In non-religious Buddhism and advanced psychological recovery, this game of being resentful and then ‘letting go’ of resentments or defects arises from the carry-over from dysfunctional religious doctrine. Constantly ‘letting go’ means and implies that serenity can never be achieved because we are in the turmoil of always creating resentments, then realizing we have them, and then we must conduct some repetitive exercise (like prayer, surrender, and forgiveness) to let them go — wash, rinse, repeat. That’s not serenity, it’s a never-ending cycle of turmoil.

When character and consciousness — how they work in addiction — are understood in an addicted mind-set, all this repetitive chaos is optional. The achievement of the mental state of nirvana (serenity) is what Siddhartha Gautama taught in Buddhism’s very brief initial phase: a psychology of compassionate mind. Bill Wilson, without knowing it, gave us the very vague possibility of achieving this in recovery, albeit hidden under religious chaos and contradictions. He attempted to eliminate the cycle of ‘get a resentment-letting go-get a resentment-letting go.’ That’s tiresome and there are mental disciplines to eliminate this cycle. It begins with the word continued.

Siddhartha Gautama offered a way to achieve compassionate serenity that has been lost and buried under 22 centuries of religious speculation. His was the first cleanly atheist version of achieving psychological serenity. Bill Wilson hinted at a similar thing in his maintenance steps, but again, the nascent psychology was buried under religious self-deprecation and speculation.

These have been recurring awarenesses for me. Kind regards…

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Richard Clark has been clean and sober since 22 Sep 1980. He got involved in AA because of the wisdom of an old-timer (In 1980 Gord B. had been sober since 1952), Richard was very open about his atheism and those men and women welcomed him in ‘as is’. He’s been sober since then with no relapses. He has started two agnostic meetings that still operate and has been a therapist in addictions work since 1984. Richard maintains a private practise with clients all across Canada and is active in his weekly agnostic meeting.

He has written three books and is presently writing a fourth book for addiction counsellors and then another one on the modern practise of recovery in Buddhism (atheist version). And here is a website with more information: Green Room Lectures.

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For a PDF of today’s article, click here: Continuously Avoiding Continued.

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The post Continuously Avoiding Continued   first appeared on AA Agnostica.

Hi folks,

Books – good ones – are excellent Christmas presents. You can buy some now for your family members or friends. Most will be delivered before December 25th and even though some may not, they are still a truly wonderful Christmas gift.

We have listed and described a number of books (eighteen) here on this website: Books. All of these are for people in recovery from alcoholism. And they are also for those who simply don’t believe in a “God”. When I got sober some fifteen years ago, not a single one of these books existed. I am so pleased that now they are available, truly popular, and helpful for all the folks in recovery.

All of these books are available on Amazon. And when a book is available on Amazon in the United States, it is also available in Canada and in another dozen countries.

Now here’s a tough question: How many books have you read over your lifetime? Twenty or thirty? Two hundred or three hundred? More? Less? Although I don’t read much these days, I’ve always enjoyed reading books. I’ve learned a great deal from reading books and I’ve found reading to be both a learning and enjoyable experience.

So now I will discuss the four books in the above image.

The first book is Beyond Belief: Agnostic Musings for 12 Step Life. This is the book published on January 21, 2013 by Joe C.

I first met Joe back in 2010. I was a desperate human being at the time. I got sober on March 8th of that year and I couldn’t stand the traditional AA meetings. They had a God in six of their 12 Steps and ended their meetings with the Lord’s Prayer. God dammit! Even though I have a BA and an MA in Religious Studies I have zero belief in a deity. That belief doesn’t make any sense to me at all.

So after about six months of sobriety I heard about a meeting initially launched by Joe on September 24th, 2009. The meeting is called Beyond Belief Agnostics and Freethinkers. When I went to that meeting in Toronto – even though I live an hour and half away in Hamilton – I was super delighted with the meeting! So for about six years I went to that meeting regularly, on Thursdays and Saturdays. And then in 2016 I launched a We Agnostics meeting in Hamilton.

Alright, back to Joe’s book! This is another quote on the front page: “daily reflections for nonbelievers, freethinkers and EVERYONE”. Every single day in the book begins with a thought provoking quote and ends with questions for the readers. It’s a VERY popular book! Here is one of the many reactions to the book on Amazon: “This book is irreplaceable. It is by far my favourite ‘go to’ each and every day. Much food for thought, and an excellent way to start the day”.

And you can learn more about the book in this article: Beyond Belief: Agnostic Musings for 12 Step Life.

The second book is The Little Book: A Collection of Alternative 12 Steps. I published this book on February 20th, 2013, one month after Joe published his book. After getting sober, I was eventually delighted to find non-godly versions of the 12 Steps. I was actually amazed that there were so many secular versions. The book includes the Beyond Belief Agnostic and Freethinkers secular version of the Steps. So there are 20 – mostly secular – versions of the 12 Steps in The Little Book.

There are also four secular interpretations of each of the Steps in this book. These were written by authors who had written books, two women and two men. Let me mention one of each. Stephanie Covington is one of the authors. Her book is called A Woman’s Way Through the Twelve Steps. Published in 1994, it remains a very popular book on Amazon. There are also interpretations of each of the Steps by Gabor Maté, the author of The Myth of Normal, his most recent book.

Finally, I end the book with a brief essay on The Origins of the 12 Steps. Here are more details: The Little Book: A Collection of Alternative 12 Steps.

Ten years ago, in 2014, I published a book called The Alternative 12 Steps: A Secular Guide to Recovery. This was a second edition and it took me a full year to find the authors and get their permission to republish the book. The authors are two women, Martha Cleveland and Arlys G., and I was very impressed that it had initially been published in 1991. As I wrote in the Foreword of the second edition, the book is “the first ‘non-Godly’ version of the 12 Steps ever published”.

Over the years, this has been a very popular book.

Here is a quote from the book about Step 3: “We can learn the universal, generic pattern of life’s dance from the 12 Steps. But in our individual dance of life, we choose our own music and dance our own dance”. The book is 130 pages long and it is all about sharing and interpreting each of the 12 steps in order to be helpful to folks in recovery.

Of course, this book is available on Amazon.

And now the fourth and final book to be discussed today. It’s written by bob k and is called Key Players in AA History.

Like Joe C, bob has been a friend of mine for a chunk of time. He is a pro-golfer and he taught me and my wife how to play golf a little over a decade ago! And over the years he has written well over 50 articles on this AA Agnostica website.

Key Players is an excellent book! Here is a quote from Ernest Kurtz, the author of Not-God: A History of Alcoholics Anonymous: “The Profiles crafted by bob k are drawn from multiple sources and presented in an engaging manner accessible to all those interested in the history of AA”. There are a total of 40 chapters in the Second Edition of the book – published in February, 2023 – and here is something I said about it back then: “Every chapter is well researched, much of it is fascinating, and all of it is written in an enjoyable and easily readable style.”

Mister bob has written another book – The Secret Diaries of Bill W. – which was published on February 18th, 2023. And another book written by him – Daily Reflections for Modern 12-Step Recovery – will also soon be published!

So that’s it! These are four of many super good books! Reading books is a true pleasure. Go ahead and get them before, during or after the 2024 Christmas period.

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For a PDF of this article, click here: Christmas Gifts: Books!

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The post Christmas Gifts: Books! first appeared on AA Agnostica.